It’s that time again! I’m so grateful to have Caitlin from Fit, Fierce and Fabulous visiting today! She’s kind enough to share with us an experience which I’m sure is difficult for her to talk about. Let’s show her some love.
Hi Friends! I’m so excited to be here for ! When I saw a few people posting about life lessons I knew I had to share one that occured about 5 years ago.
After a difficult break up my senior year of high-school, I was refusing to date and vow to be single until I really found someone I could trust, love, and considerable, have a long term relationship with. I dated here and there and into the spring of my freshman year of college, I met a boy at a restaurant that I was working at. Let’s call the boy, Steve. ( I won’t use his real name )
Steve was good looking, kind, sweet, sensitive, and gave me huge butterflies every time I stared into those blue eyes of his. Throughout the entire summer, we shared stories of our past, goals for our future, and made every possible moment to be together before I was going to transfer to a new college in the fall. When I left for my new school, I was sad but I told him we would be able to make it because I felt so strong about our relationship, and even though long distance relationships have hurt others, I knew we would be ok.
|Phase 1 – TENSION BUILDING:
Tension increases, breakdown of communication, victim feels need to placate the abuser.
|Phase 4 – CALM:
Incident is “forgotten”, no abuse is taking place.
|Phase 2 – INCIDENT:
Verbal and emotional abuse. Anger, blaming, arguing. Threats. Intimidation.
|Phase 3 – RECONCILIATION:
Abuser apologizes, gives excuses, blames the victim, denies the abuse occurred, or says it wasn’t as bad as the victim claims.
After 9 months of abuse- I was at a meeting with a few friends and I got a text message wondering why I hadn’t answered his phone call. I told him I was at a meeting and would call him later. As usual, he went crazy, telling me be was I a B** and other things for not picking up on the first ring.Something snapped in me, and I excused myself from the meeting, walked outside and let it all out.
Do you know anyone in an abusive relationship?
How have you helped yourself/them go through it?
Thank you so much for sharing, Caitlin. I’m so sorry you had to go through a relationship like that. I’m thankful you found your way out of it.
If you’re interested in sharing in Lessons: The Hard Way, shoot me an email at iwrite23 [at] gmail [dot] com