A perpetual state of the in-between. It’s what I feared I’d be in when I moved home after college instead of following suit of my classmates and moving on my own into a fancy apartment with a fancy job. Funnily enough, I have found that most of life is spent in-between. At least it has been lately for me. I seem to always be looking ahead of where I am now and wondering why I can’t get there sooner. It’s probably the most frustrating quality about myself for myself. I’m trying very hard to remind myself to be thankful for where I am in my life right now. I need to remember to be thankful to be working and for a paycheck and for food on my table and a comfortable roof over my head.
This holiday season I am reminded that I have not only everything I need but all I want too. I am lucky. I’ve never really struggled or have gone without. I have a family who has always loved and supported me and who raised me comfortably giving me everything I could ever dream of. This holiday season we’re giving back. There are families who have less than we do, and it’s been so much fun gathering help and shopping to give these families a Christmas they’ll remember. Doing this reminds me that I need to, I have to, be thankful for where I am. I am just fine. I am just fine. I am just fine. Everyone does what they have to do. And right now, I’m doing what I have to do.
Would I rather be writing? Of course. Would I rather be standing before a classroom of teenagers discusses life and works of art? Definitely. Will I get there some day? Absolutely. I will. I have to.