almost perfect

I’m sure everyone can say yes when asked if they know a couple who bickers all the time.  And I mean…all. the. time.  It’s almost as if that’s their way of loving each other.  Which seems to bizarre to me, but whatever works, right?

{and truth be told, J & I bicker a lot mostly for entertainment value.  Arguing with him is just so fun!}

But I was noticing last night how refreshing it is to be around a couple who are sincerely nice to each other.  They are considerate to each other and just darn right respect each other.  This, unfortunately, seems to be the rarer of the the two.

I realize that there are several different ways that people relate to each other, and in my case when you couple up two very strong personalities who are sarcastic ninety percent of the time–the relation can seem stressed.  But only when you are inside the relationship do you realize it’s all fun and games.

I once had a co-worker who was young.  She was a beautiful, beautiful girl with giant blue eyes and a sweet disposition.  But she had this boyfriend that stole everything beautiful about her.  He made her cry.  A lot.  He would simply tear her down.  Watching their relationship reminded me so much of boot camp for soldiers.  Where you’re torn down and rebuilt into a soldier.  But what was he trying to rebuild her into?  She was already pretty great the way she was.  And I couldn’t understand what kept her there.  All she wanted was to be loved, which I guess is what every girl wants.  She would do the sweetest things for him, and in return he pull ridiculous games with her which include, but are not limited to: calling the police when she showed up to his place, pushing her, telling her not to talk to him for weeks on end, refusing to be her friend on facebook {silly, but they’d been together for about 2 years…i mean, really?}.  Now we didn’t make much money, and if you weren’t the manager {cough cough} you really didn’t get many hours.  But his birthday was coming up.  And she so badly wanted to do something amazing for him.  She saved up her tiny little paychecks and clawed for more hours so she could take him for a spa day and a wonderful dinner.  She also saved up {and was SO excited} to give him satellite radio.  I was anxious to hear after the weekend had passed how it had all gone.  And much to my surprise, she said it went wonderfully.  He was nice to me all weekend long. I couldn’t help but think, but he’s your boyfriend.  Shouldn’t he be nice to you all the time? But a few days later, everything went back to normal.  He would text her awful things.  He would refuse to see her.  And it broke my heart for her.

Watching a relationship like that just makes you wonder what are we not seeing? And I know most girls go through a relationship something like that {but maybe not to that degree} and it’s all part of a learning experience, but how necessary is it.  Really?  I’m going to be lame here for a minute and refer back to an episode of The Hills where Lauren and Lo are discussing Audrina’s relationship with Justin Bobby.  And Lauren tells Lo that every girl has that one guy that they want to change.  And they all want to be the ONE girl who the guy changes for.  And Lo responds with but why would you want a boy you have to change?  Shouldn’t you want one who is perfect already? Uhm.  Yes, Lo.  Couldn’t agree with you more!

So here’s to finding and loving men who are perfect already!

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About JoElizabeth

I am a writer who loves to explore all different types of relationships. I am most happy when surrounded by my loved ones and furry children. I've never met a stranger, and I talk way too much. My favorite things to do are eat {preferably at a restaurant} with good friends, write, watch DVDs of TV series {especially FRIENDS}, drink lots of coffee and learn.
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